Eat My Dust, You Insensitive Fuck (Dave/Eridan)

[Zeke]

Dave sighed in irritation as he closed out the pesterChum window on his iShades for the fifth time. That douchebag just was not going to give up. You have better things to do than fuck around with that asshat; things like fixing all these unstable time loops, because fuck if some of the alternate yous don't understand how this shit works.

Following your next unstable loop back to its source leads you to foreign territory, namely: the trolls' session. You know it immediately from Terezi's descriptions of her land. You shoot her a pester, but it seems she's elsewhere right now. You take a moment to get your bearings, and find nothing in the immediate area that could have cause the instability. With an irritated grunt, you head to the nearest Gate and head to the next area, whatever it may be.

You wind up in a disconcertingly monochrome Land, with the dead bodies of strange, lizard-like creatures strewn all over the ground. The sort of remind you of your nakodiles, so finding them dead pisses you off just a little. Your shades ping again and you close out the window without thinking. After a moment you send him a message yourself.

- - turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering caligulasAquarium [CA] - -
TG: would you stop fucking trolling me man
TG: dont you know that everyone hates you
TG: jegus youre so fucking annoying i really dont blame them

[raunchyJanitor]

None of the humans are replying to your trolling and it is making you grow agitated that they would barely respond with much more than two or three half-bassed sentences before blocking you. The last human you are deciding to keep up with trolling is the stupid fuckin mainstream one with those douche bag glasses he thinks are so fuckin cool. If given the chance, you would drown him the second you set eyes on him. Maybe then he would show a different expression other than that permanent poker face of disinterest. At first you were annoyed that you were also being ignored by this asshole, that is, until he finally started replying. Now you were fuming that a pathetic land dweller would say such things you internally knew were true, but would never let such a low life know by expounding upon why he was such a fuckin moron.

CA: silence!
CA: i havve had enough of your slander for the twwo seconds you havve spoken
CA: you wwill listen to my owwn noww and stop tunaing me out
CA: i cod not givve a fuckin shit the equivalent girth of a plankton about wwhether or not they hate me
CA: because they should hate me
CA: i am fuckin trollin them
CA: if you wwere not so brain washed by the man you wwould knoww this, but you are
CA: howw do you stand bein such a slavve of pop culture?
CA: i bet if you heard somethin actually wworth harrin, you wwouldnt knoww it if it shot you in the fuckin fin

You cross your arms after your small rant, feeling better that someone was finally paying attention to what you had to say to them.